Young Life meets teens where they are

By Marinell Scott Thornburg, Journal staff | Monday, October 27, 2008

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Chris Parrish and Corey Harouff are two young men who have found their calling as missionaries to young people. High school kids, kids who may not fit in or have a lot of friends, popular kids — all of them need a friend. That friend may be an adult who is consistently involved in the kid’s life, and it may be Jesus.

The mission field is here in Rapid City, and the way they reach these young people is through Young Life.

“I consider myself a missionary in my own hometown,” Parrish said. “I’m called to do it, so I am committed to it, like an overseas missionary is called by God.”

Young Life is a Christian ministry begun in 1941 that reaches out to middle school, high school and college-age kids. Nondenominational and nonpolitical, the focus of Young Life is to reach kids where they are, to get to know them and have a relationship with them, then to introduce them to the message of Jesus Christ

“We are a relational ministry,” said Harouff, area director for Rapid City/Hill City Young Life.  “We have a thousand kids on our rolls. A lot are unchurched, and we want to get them plugged into a church. But Young Life is not the church. We are an outreach ministry.”

Harouff explained how volunteer Young Life leaders “pursue kids on their turf. Young Life leaders are proactive. We go to the kids. Our leaders go to their gutter.”

According to Young Life, leaders can be found at school sporting events, concerts, plays, malls and fast-food restaurants, meeting kids and building significant relationships with them.

This means that volunteer leaders get to know the kids and establish a relationship of trust and respect with kids before challenging them with questions about God, Jesus and why should kids care.

“Many kids are in a defensive posture toward God,” Harouff said. “We help kids make good decisions about life, to be men and women of integrity.”

The organization has been in Rapid City since 2000, after Harouff, a former youth pastor, approached local business owner Al Rieman about starting Young Life in Rapid City.

 “Corey had to sell me on it,” Rieman said. “There was not another organization that was doing it. It was a new concept. Innovative and workable.”

Three of Rieman’s children have gone through Young Life; two now work as volunteer leaders, and one has worked as paid staff for Young Life in Sioux Falls.

“One of the most important things is rather than wait for kids who are interested, Young Life goes to where kids are at, and that’s what’s truly effective,” Rieman said. 

Harouff explains the key: “Young Life gives kids a place to belong before they believe. Kids need a forum; they need a place to go even before they believe in Jesus.” Later, Harouff said, “Kids may begin to think, ‘Maybe God is real.’ We want to earn the right for them to believe in us.”

Once a relationship has been established, Harouff said, “Kids can ask questions about life and about God. We say, ‘Come as you are, because God loves you. But we are going to challenge you.’”

A key component of Young Life is weekly club. Club is held at a neutral location (not at a church) where kids feel safe to come with their friends for a combination of fun, humor and the basic message of Jesus Christ.  Harouff refers to club as “controlled chaos,” where close to 125 kids come every Monday night.

“We laugh, play games, do skits, build camaraderie with other kids, listen to music — some secular, some Christian — and explore God together,” he said.

Club this week was a ’50s theme, and Young Life leaders were serving up hamburgers, fries and shakes for about 125 kids who came dressed in sock-hop style. Served as a side dish to their ‘50s diner eats was the message that God cares for them, as do the adult volunteers who make Young Life possible. Harouff said kids were surprised, saying, “‘You guys would make shakes for us?’ When God loves you, he doesn’t just kind of love you,” he said.

“Young Life is a safe place for kids to ask questions,” said Parrish. “But we challenge them to ask, ‘Who are you, Jesus?’ and ‘Why do I need you in my life?’”

Harouff said all “types” of kids are a part of Young Life, and although he was hesitant to categorize them as such, he said, “jocks, emos, popular kids, cheerleaders — every type of kid imaginable comes to Young Life. We remove all barriers to kids. All kids know about Young Life,” he said. “Buzz around town is, ‘Young Life is cool!’ ”

“The majority are unchurched or disinterested kids,” Parrish said. “I grew up in the church, but our group encompasses almost every kid.”

“We don’t judge people,” Harouff said. “All the external stuff is a smokescreen for something deeper going on,” he said, referring to teens who pierce themselves, cutters, those who wear bold makeup or adopt a style of dress in order to gain attention.

“Kids feel abandoned. They are hurt,” Harouff said, describing what he calls “systematic abandonment” of kids by their school, their church, their family, their community. “Society is about parents, about programming. Too much focus is on programs for kids. But kids wonder, ‘Why won’t my mom or dad spend time with me? They’re so busy focused on their work that they forget about me.’”

Harouff says because kids are hurt, they are angry. “They are saying, ‘Someone notice me! Acknowledge me! Somebody, please stop!’ And maybe kids are coming to school hungry, angry, confused, lonely,” Harouff said.

“We are not attacking the system,” Parrish said. “But churches stop focusing on the purpose and focus on the program. Sports are focused on winning. Education is focused on teachers. We recognize that kids show an outward struggle that a lot of people shun. We recognize that they have deeper core issues underneath, the judgment and condemnation they feel.” 

At Young Life, “the ‘churchiness’ is relieved,” Parrish said. “A lot of kids have the perception of church as judgmental. When we walk through with the kid, they are more receptive.”

Doug Diehl, senior pastor at First United Methodist Church in downtown Rapid City, is supportive of Young Life. “I personally came to Christ indirectly through Young Life leaders in college.

“Young Life does things we can’t do as the church,” Diehl said. “They fill in the cracks.”

Young Life as an organization puts an emphasis on safety when it comes to adult volunteers spending time with youth. Volunteers have gone through a screening process that includes an interview, review of character references and a criminal background check. Male leaders work with male students and female leaders work with female students. Staff and volunteers have trained supervisors and receive training on how to maintain appropriate boundaries in relationships with kids. Both Harouff and Parrish are ordained pastors.

Harouff said Young Life staff is supported by the community, a committee, parents and volunteers.

“Young Life has longevity. We have had a committee since Day 1. And we guard our hearts. Working 50 hours a week, to last in ministry you have to have good boundaries,” he said. He may have boundaries, but he also admits to having at least 3,000 phone numbers in his cell phone, and is quick to say, “I love you!” as he ends phone calls.

Young Life is funded through donors. Locally, more than 500 donors, churches, businesses and individuals help support Young Life’s nearly $250,000 budget. Monday, Oct. 6, the organization will have a fundraising banquet at the Ramkota Inn, where its goal is to raise $150,000. The public is invited.

“Both Chris and I know this is where God has called us,” Harouff said. “God hit me by surprise.”

“It’s a journey,” Harouff said. “Kids have been so hurt, they don’t trust adults. In Young Life, we just show up. Consistently.”

Contact Marinell Scott Thornburg at 394-8280 or marinell.thornburg@rapidcityjournal.com.

If you go

Young Life Club meets Mondays at 6:53 p.m. during the school year at the Young Life Club Room, 318 Mount Rushmore Road, Suite C2 (behind Dunn Brothers Coffee).

For more information on Rapid City & Hill City Young Life, contact Corey Harouff and Chris Parrish at 721-1238 or www.rapidcity.younglife.org

The Journey Bible Study meets from 8 to 9 p.m. Thursdays at the Young Life Club Room.

To volunteer with Young Life, contact Harouff or Parrish at 721-1238 or e-mail corey@rapidcity.younglife.org or chris@rapidcity.younglife.org.

Young Life annual fundraising banquet

When: 6:30 p.m. to 8 p.m. Monday, Oct. 6

Where: Ramkota Inn

To reserve a spot: Call 721-1238